X Y Z

And so the week ends and with it the school year. (I’m taking tomorrow as a vacation day so I can spend the girls’ first day off summer with them. Such a fun mom; though I’m not sure how much fun we’ll actually have, we don’t actually have anything planned for the day.)

We’ve had a good year but we’re glad to see summer arrive.

This week was the final letters of the alphabet were also counted off. We’ve had great fun with this little project. Olivia especially liked the fact that I was able to braid her hair into an X on Tuesday, a Y on Wednesday and a Z today. That was an adventure.

Want proof?

And finally, we recreated the first day of school picture that can be seen at the top of this very blog; my how they’ve grown.

Dictionary

In the car last Friday, Olivia called from the backseat, “Mom, what does midget mean?”

I replied, “It’s a derogatory term for people with any of the many forms of dwarfism. They don’t want to be called dwarves, though either. People with dwarfism want to be called little people.”

I glanced in the rearview mirror in time to see Alyssa roll her eyes at her friend, T, who was spending the night with us.

After catching my gaze, Alyssa smiled and said, “Do you have a dictionary up there or something?”

“You think I’m driving and reading from a dictionary?” I asked, because, hello, who does that? Crazy people who want to kill themselves, their passengers and everyone else on the road maybe.

“No,” Alyssa confessed. “But you sure sounded like a dictionary just now.”

I smiled. “Because I defined midget?”

“Because you used words like ‘derogatory’ and ‘dwarfism’ to define midget,” she replied.

“Huh,” I gave it some thought. “Olivia, midget is a word some people use to describe very short people. It’s not a nice word.” I looked at Alyssa in the mirror again. “Better?” I asked.

She smirked and said, “Much.”

Lord save me from smart-alecky twelve year olds.

Field Day(s)

Each year, the girls’ school holds two field days. One field day is for the fifth and sixth grades. The other is for Kinderkids through fourth graders. In years past, these field days were held on the same day but in different areas outside the school.

Let me backup. Field day is a day when the kids are taken outside in the afternoon for a couple of hours of playtime. Parent volunteers (not me, my kids would prefer that I be free to follow them from station to station, thanks anyway) run each station with different games. There are several stations that involve…water. Yes, it gets very wet and very muddy. But so much fun is had that no one minds.

This year, though, the field days were held on separate days. I had originally taken the day off work for Alyssa’s field day so I could attend. A few days before the day field day was supposed to happen, I asked Alyssa (again!) if she wanted me to go. Parents are invited to come watch (or you know, help, hahahaha.)

She hemmed and hawed and said she’d ask her friends if their parents were going to be there.

I told her that I wouldn’t be hurt if she didn’t want me to go; she just needed to let me know. Finally, the night before field day, she said, “You don’t have to go.”

And it was fine. I went to work an hour late (dentist appointment) and left an hour and a half early (meeting at the school to discuss Olivia and her unlabeling.)

When I got home from the meeting I asked Alyssa if any parents had come to watch their fifth and sixth graders. She shook her head. I think she was relieved that she hadn’t been the only one with a ‘fan’ in the stands. Haha. Though it would have been neat to watch her make that winning jump in the high jump. See, the fifth and sixth graders get to do to the track and field area where the do actual track and field events during their field day.

I had about a w eek and a half notice about Alyssa’s field day. I found out about Olivia’s field day at 5:30pm on Thursday, May 21. It was being held on Friday, May 22 at 12:30pm. Yeah, this time, the sixth grader brought home the papers and the first grader didn’t.

I was able to take the afternoon off work and go spend it with Olivia. I was one of two parents of first graders who showed up, but let me tell you that even if I’d been the only, there would have been no embarrassment for Olivia. She was thrilled that I was there.

Let me stop here and say that I don’t think Alyssa would have been embarrassed so much by me being at her field day. It’s just that when you’re twelve and your mommy shows up, well, come on, we all get it, right?

Eight year olds, on the other hand, still want to hold their mom’s hand and hug them close and show them off. How lucky am I that I get to do at least three more field days?

Labels...Labeling...Unlabeled?

A few years ago, Olivia’s team at school decided that because 5p- syndrome is so rare and most people have never even heard of it, she would be better served if we went with an Autism label on her IEP.

I have never said that Olivia has autism. She has a few of the symptoms, but those can be attributed to her diagnosis of 5p-. A lot of the symptoms of 5p- mirror those of autism. Even after the school put the autism label in her file, I never used it.

I kind of loved this school psychologist. He said that Olivia never really talked to him directly but she would be silly, would answer direct questions with a nod or a point or a whisper if necessary.

He wants to take the autism label out of her file because he’s afraid that if we ever change school systems, other teachers/administrators/psychologists will see Autism and not look beyond that.

He also explained that her diagnosis of 5p- syndrome almost guarantees her services as long as we feel she needs them. There is no need to tack autism on top of that.

His assessment of Olivia is that she’s very smart (duh), she’s creative, she can be quite charming and she’s extremely stubborn.

Ha! Like we didn’t know that one.

But seriously, he got all that from about three twenty minute sessions with her, during which she didn’t talk much to him. He said that sometimes she would start to answer a question, realize what she was doing and shut down again. That’s not an autism thing, that’s a stubbornness thing.

So we will continue to expose her to her peers, put her in the mainstream classroom next year with all the other second graders with as much or as little intervention as necessary to keep her up to speed academically and we’ll push her socially. It’s what she needs.

What she doesn’t need is a label that doesn’t fit her.

Honestly, I’m glad we’re losing the autism label. I went with it when they suggested it before kinderkids because they said it would help her receive and keep services. From what I learned yesterday, she doesn’t need it and in the long run, since it’s not an accurate label for her, it could hurt her.

So we’re going forward without the label. It doesn’t change anything about Olivia. She’s still her smart, creative, stubborn little self. Those characteristics will serve her well throughout her life.

And today's hair, just because:

Five More Lunches

That’s how we’re counting down the school year. We only have to pack five more lunches. Go us!!

The school is having a ‘Right to Read’ week and yesterday Olivia went to school dressed at her favorite princess. Guess which princess she chose…Elsa, right?

Nope, not this time. She informed me that there would be a lot of girls dressed as Elsa and so she wanted to wear her Rapunzel dress. Go Liv, dare to be different!!

Today the students were encouraged to dress as their favorite fairy tale character, animal or villain. Olivia chose Tinkerbell.

Yes, we’re really lucky to have a very extensive dress-up closet/bin. She has a Tinkerbell outfit that only needed a pair of pants and a long-sleeved shirt under it to make it weather/school appropriate. If the temps weren’t in the mid-50s today but instead at a normal 70-something, she could have worn a tank top or a short-sleeved shirt under the Tink costume but alas, our weather is bi-polar and so we keep going up and down and then up again. I hope Mother Nature gets her meds figured out and settles into typical temps for this time of year soon.

Ahh but Tinkerbell. She’s so darned cute. How awesome is it that O’s hair has grown to the point that I can do this to it?

So much fun to be had with only five days left of first and sixth grade.

Dropping Physical Therapy

Tom and I met with the physical therapist from Olivia’s school last Friday.

Miss Mary Rose called us because she won’t be at a meeting we have scheduled with the school psychologist/teachers/principal for Wednesday. Miss M.R. has to make a recommendation to be presented at that meeting and she wanted our input before finalizing her report.

Her feelings are that she’s brought Olivia as far as she can in gross motor function.

Here are the things Olivia can do:

She can navigate the halls with no trouble. She doesn’t walk with a limp or any visual sign that walking is at all difficult for her.

She can run. She can play any game asked of her in gym class. She may not CHOOSE to play those games but she CAN play them.

She can climb. She doesn’t like to do this but she can do it. She enjoyed climbing when we’re at the park but doesn’t really trust other kids around her not to get pushy.

She can take the stairs with alternating feet without holding on.

She can hold the plank position.

She can hold the Superman position.

She can hope on one foot.

She can catch a ball with just her hands, not using her body against which to catch it.

She can do so, so much.

Miss M.R. said that Olivia’s balance is one thing that they still work on a little bit. O’s got great core strength but standing on a balance beam (about three inches from the floor) and holding out her hands and then lifting one foot is hard for Olivia.

Olivia very much worries about falling so I think it might not be for lack of being able to do this thing so much as her own fear of falling while trying that keeps her from actually doing it.

This summer Tom is going to put a low balance beam in our backyard for Olivia to play on.

See, that’s part of what we discussed with Miss M.R. Playing. She feels like most of the skills Olivia has gained and will continue to develop can be learned through play.

And Olivia’s biggest weakness in school is not gross motor skills. It’s her social abilities.

I got to the school early last week for our meeting with the PT. I was able to watch Olivia as she played at recess. Olivia sat on the ground and played in the dirt. She sat by herself, keeping very much to herself while all the other kids ran and jumped and climbed and swung and slid around her.

Several times during the ten or so minutes that I watched, someone would stop and sit with Olivia. The kids who sat with her talked to her and Olivia looked at them but never talked to them. They’d sit with her for a minute or so then go back to their games.

I want so much for her to have friends, to interact with the kids at school. She needs to be in the classroom for that. So we’re dropping PT and giving her more classroom time.

Obviously we’re leaving it open to bring PT back if O shows any sign of regression, if she loses any of the skills she’s already acquired. But for now, PT isn’t as important as just being with her peers.

A Talent Show

Alyssa’s school puts on a Sixth Talent Show each year. This is entirely voluntary, the students even have to audition to get the chance to perform.

Alyssa and three friends, A, S and T performed a Skillet song.

Can I just be a mom here and say that they were freaking adorable? So much fun and cuteness and they’re twelve and SO BRAVE.

My mom and Tom joined me at the school to watch the show.

As we sat waiting for the show to begin I told my mom that if my school had done something like this, I would have been one of the kids sitting at the back of the room, not performing. I would have WANTED to perform but I wouldn’t have had the nerve, the confidence.

I am so, so glad that Alyssa has awesome friends who encourage her and whom she encourages and that together, they were brave enough to climb onto the stage and sing. They SANG. And it was awesome.

Okay, pulling myself together again. Ahem.

Alyssa is everything I wish I’d been when I was twelve. She’s confident, she’s strong, she’s so smart and can be so sweet and yet she stands up for herself and others when she feels that she or others are being picked on. She has amazing friends who are also smart and confident and kind.

She doesn’t doubt her own talent, her own beauty, inner or outer. She exudes a strength that I hope grows and blossoms as she does.

This talent show was so much fun, for the kids as well as the parents. The kids made their own costumes, came up with their own acts, picked their own music. They performed their way and it was amazing.

Twelve is so great for Alyssa. I hope it just keeps getting better.