Yahtzee!

Even though the new year hasn’t started, Alyssa and I have already gotten a head start on my new years resolution to have a game night once a week.

I got her Yahtzee for Christmas and last night we played a round after Olivia was asleep. I love that A has to do math during this game and she loves making noise with the five dice.

Once I’d won the first round, we started a movie and just sat together, enjoying a moment of just us. She spent the night with my mom the night before and so I kept telling her how glad I was that she was there, at home, with us. I miss her when she’s gone, even if it’s just for a night.

I can tell she loves hearing those things and because it’s true, it’s easy to say to her.

Part way through the movie we were watching, Alyssa asked to play another round of Yahtzee. I agreed and we got our cards and dice out.

We were maybe three turns in when Olivia woke up and came to find us. Her eyes were red from having woken up to find me not next to her.

I pulled her close to me and told Alyssa we could finish our game tomorrow.

The look of disappointment on her face broke my heart. She sighed with resignation and leaned away from me, against the arm of the couch.

I felt her resentment toward Olivia, her sense that O’s needs always trump her own. And yes, needing comfort in the night might be more important that a game of Yachtzee, when you’re not quite ten years old, it just plain sucks when your time with your mom, time that is precious and rare, is cut short by your annoying little sister.

So I settled Olivia next to me on the couch, she was already back to sleep anyway, and told Alyssa it was her turn.

The bright look she gave me, the wonder that I wasn’t going to push her aside to take care of her sister, the joy in her smile…it made me so glad I didn’t postpone that game a moment longer.

I know that sometimes, we need to know that the world doesn’t revolve around us. I know that this is a lesson my girls need to learn. But sometimes, some nights, it’s nice to know that your mom’s world does revolve around you. I was glad to let Alyssa be my gravitational pull last night, the one around whom I revolved, even if just for a few moments. She needed that and so did I.

PS Alyssa won the second round of Yahtzee.