Tired

The entire family woke up tired today.

Tom was so bewildered. See, he usually wakes up refreshed and ready to start his day. He usually wakes up between 4:30 and 5:00...ready…to…start…the…day.

Take a minute and let that sink in. He rarely wakes up tired.

When he told me this morning, with a bit of confusion in his voice, that he woke up tired this morning, I just looked at him. Because, hello, I thought everyone woke up tired every day.

I mean, I’ve been waking up tired for over twelve years at this point.

What is this word ‘refreshed’ and what does it mean? I can’t even imagine just opening my eyes one morning and being ready to get up and start the day. I have a feeling I will always, ALWAYS open my eyes, check the clock, do a quick mental tally and decide if I have time for a ten minute snooze.

I know people are probably wonder why I don’t go to be earlier so that I get more rest in the night. I don’t want to. After the girls are asleep, I get maybe an hour of time alone. I need that time alone. I need to recharge emotionally even if I’m not recharging physically so that I can be kind and loving to my family.

After Tom left the room, Olivia looked up from the drawer she was rummaging through and asked, “Why am I so tired this morning?”

I managed, barely, to not roll my eyes at her and said, “Well, maybe if you weren’t up half the night whimpering in your sleep, you wouldn’t be tired this morning.”

She gave me a look of wide-eyed innocence. “I did that?” she asked.

Yep, she did that. And because she was only half asleep all night, it meant I was none-asleep.

So yeah, we’re ALL freaking tired this morning. I wanted to welcome the rest of my family to my world. But I didn’t because I’m afraid that if I make it too welcoming, they’ll stay and we’ll all spend the rest of our lives cranky and tired and that’s not appealing at all.