There are moments when I sit back and wonder how I got so lucky. My girls are so sweet, loving, amazing. They’re kind and smart and funny.
And they love me so much. I sometimes wonder at the amazingness of that. I mean, what did I do to deserve them?
There are times when I am so far from perfect and yet these beautiful beings forgive me for my imperfections and love me anyway.
Last night I had a horrible headache. There was rain coming and the headache set in at about 1:30 in the afternoon and really took hold around 5:00pm. The rain started at 9:00, which is also when the handfuls of pain killers (ibuprofen and yes, ‘handfuls’ is hyperbole) kicked in. I finally started feeling better.
But before that point, Tom cooked the girls’ dinner. I helped Olivia with hers but Tom also washed the dishes because he could tell I was in pain.
Again…why am I so lucky? With all my faults, I get these girls, this husband; people who are so generous and kind and loving. They take such good care of me and at moments like last night, when I was feeling pretty worthless, it was humbling to know that they all love me so much…so much more than I feel I deserve.
I look into these eyes…
And I’m breathless.
I look at this face…
And I’m grateful.
Breathless and grateful that they’re mine. That they want to be near me, that they let me soak them in, that they share their perfect imperfections with me. That they forgive me for my own imperfections and love me both because of those imperfections and in spite of them.
If there is such a thing as past lives, I can’t help but wonder who I was and what I did to get so lucky in this incarnation.