Mean

I have been known to be a mean mom. Yes, it's true. I have made my children finish their green beans before letting them have ice cream (well, Alyssa. Olivia loves green beans and on some days would prefer them to the ice cream.)

On the last day of Alyssa's career as a first grader, I'd managed to get a "You're mean!" out of both girls before 7:15am.

"My work here is done," I announced, thinking I should go back to bed since there was no way I could accomplish more than being mean to a seven year old and a three year old in the first 45 minutes they were awake.

What had I done that was so very evil?

Well, Olivia declared my meaness when I made her pee on the potty. I know, the evil is never ending.

Alyssa decided that I was probably possessed when I put more toothpaste on her toothbrush after she washed it all off before even putting the thing in her mouth.

But you see...I'm okay with being mean.

I'm not here to be their friend. These girls will have friends. Lots of them. Some will lead them astray and other will pull them back. Some will push them out of their comfort zones and others will always be on their side, no matter what choice they make.

I am their mother. It is not my job to be their friend. I'm here to parent them. To teach them right from wrong. To comfort them when they're hurt but also to teach them not to hurt others. I'm here to make sure they don't eat ice cream for breakfast and that they get at least a vegetable a day.

I have friends who probably think I'm way more lenient than I should be. I'm okay with that. We all make choices we feel are best for our family.

Yes, my girls still sleep with me. Yes, I hate it. But at heart, I'm a lazy mother. I'm a lazy, mean mom. There are some things I won't let my laziness get in the way of, such at the toothpaste. There are other things that just aren't worth the fight, such as buying a small toy at the zoo we get to once a year.

I want my girls to know love, kindness and joy. I also want them to learn responsibility, self-control and how to be kind to others. It is my job to teach them common courtesy, since it seams that it isn't so very common these days.

So bring on the "You're mean!" I take those moments as signs that I'm doing my job as their mother.

I will continue to retort, "Someday, you'll thank me for this!" I've totally become my mother!