Prom (or Not?)

Yes, I Did Skip a “Junior Class Parent” Meeting and I Feel Zero Guilt Over Doing So

I attended at least eight parent meetings over the span of the school year that were geared toward raising money for the junior/senior prom and then planning said prom.

It was miserable. We sold pies, we organized a ‘Family Fun Night’, which included a dinner (I was on the food committee with my kind of moms), kiddie games, a silent auction and a concession stand. We sold more pies, we held 50/50 raffles at every single stupid football and basketball games.

Then we met to talk about how we’d spend the money we’d raised.

Then school closed for the year on March 13 and…everything stalled.

We still got emails from the teacher who was in charge of the prom (she works with the juniors and their parents each year doing this. That poor, poor woman.)

We also got FB updates.

So, prom is now happening on July 18. But there will be no dancing; also no dates. Only students who were juniors or seniors during the 2019-2020 school year are invited. It’s happening at a hotel nearby and there will be dinner and prizes. Formal dress is encouraged but not required.

Yeah, Alyssa thinks is sounds awesome too.

On the Wednesday before the Fourth of July, I got a FB message from Mrs. R, the teacher mentioned above. She attached the agenda for the parent meeting that was being held the very next day, July 2.

The agenda was roughly this:

1. Discuss T-shirt – someone needs to organize this.

2. Discuss prizes – someone needs to organize this.

3. Chaperones – we need as many as possible.

I replied to her message and said, “So sorry, can’t make the meeting. But I can totally be a chaperone if you need me.”

She responded almost immediately with, “We’ll definitely need you, I’ll put you on the list.”

And that’s that.

I was NOT going to be in charge of T-shirts.

I was NOT going to be in charge of prizes.

And you know what? I knew that if I attended that stupid meeting, I would somehow end up in charge of one of those things, either by myself or as a co-organizer.

No thank you.

And guess what?

I feel no guilt whatsoever about any of this. Nope, not even a little. I’ve done more than my share in this whole Junior parent thing. I mean, damn, there were maybe five of us who showed up to every meeting. Two dads were among the regulars. But you know what? There are over 30 kids in this class. That means that 1/6 of us carried the load for the rest.

So I’m done.

I will chaperone because I want to be there.

But I am not organizing another thing for this ‘prom.’

I hope it’s great for the kids but at this point, it feels like a farce anyway so let’s just get through it, get it over with and move on.

Updated: So I casually mentioned to Tom that Alyssa and my mom are going to the mall (in FORT WAYNE) to get Alyssa a dress for this prom. I think he came close to going into shock. He got very busy researching the guidelines for gatherings during this 'unprecedented time'.

He's VERY against either me or Alyssa attending this prom. He thinks it's dangerous and stupid of the school to even consider a gathering like this when they're not even sure how they're going to do school this fall.

I get it. I do. I get his angst and his worry and his fear. But I also am so tired of not living.

I mean, damn it, Alyssa and I both go to work every single week. We deal with people every single day. I go to the grocery store.

If we do these things, why are we so worried about something that actually be fun?

I know Tom's answer. He'll say that work is 'necessary' as are groceries. But gathering with 50+ people in a ballroom at a local hotel for dinner and prizes is NOT.

Yes. True. But maybe...it is necessary? For our mental health, for our well-being?

I will be wearing a mask that night. Alyssa will too. Will others? Maybe not but I can socially distance with the best of them.

Something's got to give, is what I'm saying.