Game Night

The moment I mentioned that Alyssa that I wanted to have a game night with her each week in 2013, she latched on to that idea and clung tight. Because I mentioned the idea two weeks before 2013 even started, we actually managed to get two game nights played in 2012.

Alyssa craves my attention. She believes, with her whole little heart that Olivia get the majority of my attention and when you’re ten, attention might as well be love. And her perception is her truth, that I can’t deny. I can tell her over and over that I don’t think I give O more attention but if Alyssa sees it that way, it is that way for her.

I don’t think she consciously believes that I love Olivia more than I love her. At least I hope she doesn’t think I love her sister more. But Alyssa definitely keeps track of the things I do for her sister and is good at making sure she gets her share of me.

I’m okay with this. I understand that sometimes actions are more important than words and just because I tell her I love her all the time, having me show it through touches, snuggles and yes, game night mean so much to her.

So we’ve played. We’ve played Yahtzee, Life (the game of), Jumanji, and this past Saturday, IUopoly (the Indiana University version of Monopoly.)

After our two and a half hour game, which ended only because the bank was out of money, Alyssa leaned back with a satisfied sigh and said, “Now I know why you wouldn’t want to play games every night. That was a lot of work.”

She’s a smart one, that girl. And I hope she grows up knowing how lucky I feel to have her here, wanting my attention, my love, my devotion. I hope she knows how much of all that she’s got, that she’s had it all since before she was even born.