The last few nights have been rough on Olivia. Her fever seems to get worse in the night and this makes her miserable and well, we all know that misery loves company and in our house, this translates to a miserable Olivia loves a miserable Mom.
The night before last she woke up at 12:30 and cried out that she hurt all over. I went to her, touched her hot forehead and went to get her some medicine. I also brought her water with me and settled in next to her bed in hopes that she’d fall back to sleep, even if it was fitful, in just a few minutes.
Man, I’m stupid.
She tossed and turned and moaned and whined for over an hour. Some of the things she said/asked:
“Why do I hurt so much?”
“Where did I get these germs?”
“How did the germs get in my body?”
“Why does God even make germs?”
“Why can’t God just make me better?”
“When is the medicine going to work?”
“I think I’m going to cry.”
“Do I look like I’m going to cry?”
After an hour of murmuring reassuring answers to her questions, I gently suggested she try to sleep. She started to argue, in that sad (and yet SO annoying) sick voice, but I continued, “Sleep is another way, along with medicine, for you to feel better. When you’re sleeping, your body is fighting the germs.”
She looked suspicious (and sick) but agreed to try.
I kissed her warm cheek and went to my own bed, hoping desperately that she would sleep.
Fifteen minutes later, she called out, “Can I have the bunny?”
But…she’s sick. So I got up, found the bunny-shaped nightlight and handed it to her. I rubbed her back for a minute or so and then told her I was going to sleep in my bed and reminded her that sleep would help her feel better.
She played with that stupid bunny for over an hour, turning the light off and on, moaning every so often, and whimpering between the moans.
At 3:00, I finally gave in and asked her if she wanted to lay with me in my bed. I just couldn’t sit on the floor by her bed for another minute and if she was next to me, maybe the comfort of my sleeping body would help her. I don’t know; I was desperate.
But last night…ahhh, I’m hopeful we’ve turned a corner. She fell asleep around 8:30 and slept without a peep until 5:00. Can you even imagine? It was wonderful.
I’d given her Tylenol at 8 as a preemptive fever preventer. When she woke up at 5:00, she was warm but not burning hot. I got up and got her a dose of ibuprofen because, yeah, warm when she’s been as sick as she’s been, let’s not take chances. By 6:00, when I felt able to drag myself down to get the thermometer, her temp was 99.5, so yes, still low grade, but… ‘only’ low grade, right?
We’ll take our victories where we can.
The point is, she slept which means, of course, that I slept!! Hallelujah and amen.