No Credit

I have really good kids.

I do. They're respectful, they're kind. They're loving and funny.

Sure they can also be bossy, messy, demanding and annoying, but those things typicall occur at home, with me as the target of their bossing, messing, demanding, annoying ways.

I don't take credit for their goodness. I can't. It's just who they are.

I have a friend whose child is a darter. She runs every single time her mother lets go of her hand. Whether they're in a store, a parking lot, a park, it doesn't matter. She runs.

Neither of my kids do this. They never have.

I can help Olivia out of her carseat, stand her on the ground beside the car and know she'll be there in the five seconds it takes me to retrieve my purse and turn back to take her hand so we can walk into the store together.

I can let both A and O browse the toy aisle at WalMart knowing they'll stay in the aisle I've picked, not leaving my sight.

But I didn't teach them these things. I can't take credit for these behaviors.

It's just their nature to stay by my side.

I got really, really lucky. I have no idea what to tell my friend when she asks how you break a darter from darting.

I'm having enough trouble breaking a thumb-sucker from sucking, a bed-wetter from wetting, a hair-puller from pulling (her own hair, she pulls her own hair, not anyone elses.)

But I also don't blame myself for the above 'issues.'

Yes, I take plenty of blame for a lot of things that probably aren't my fault, I won't take the blame for the things mentioned above. I can't. It's just their nature.

I know that my girls' sleep issues are my fault. I do take the blame for that. But the others? Not so much.

As my girls continue to grow and amaze and challenge me, I realize that so much of who they are has nothing to do with me. They came by so many of their traits through nature.

I can teach them, mold them, try to model good, decent behavior for them. I can show them how to share and be kind and how to give back to our society. I can teach them to write thank you notes, and to give change to the lady collecting for Riley Hospital for Children. I can remind them to hold the door open for the person following us into a store.

But there are so many things about them that I can't change, that I wouldn't change even if I could. I wouldn't change their senses of humor, their need to stick by my side when we're in unfamiliar surrounding, their desire to learn new and exciting things. I wouldn't change Alyssa's constant need to be flipping, spinning, swimming through a room or Olivia's instinctive urge to follow her sister's example in almost everything.

They are good kids. I didn't make them that way, but I can help them stay that way. I hope.