Pretty Eyes

I am a pretty snarky person by nature. I’m not proud of this, it’s just a fact.

As my girls get older and listen to every single word I say, often regurgitating it at the most inopportune moments, I realize that my snark needs to be curbed.

Alyssa and I watched the last season of The Biggest Loser together and we had fun. But I also found that I had to stop myself from saying snarky things about the contestants. I’m not talking about their weight, I mean, come on, they obviously want to change that or they wouldn’t be on this show, but sometimes, they were whiny or bossy or just plain obnoxious and I’d start to say something obnoxious about them right there in front of Alyssa.

But I’d stop and think about what I was doing. What was I teaching my ten year old daughter? Nothing good, that’s for sure. And see, I heard her say some of the snark before I even had the chance to do so and where do we think she learned that way of thinking? We don’t have to think, we KNOW she learned it from her lovely, charming, delightful mother.

So I started finding positive things to say about the contestants that annoyed me the most. I’d mention that one guy had really pretty eyes, or a couple of the girls had great hair. Or, I’d get really deep and go beyond the physical and mention how supportive one person was to a teammate. That was a good one if I do say so myself.

I’m trying here, is what I’m saying.

I can’t always help the snark but I’m trying so hard to mix in some positivity too, teach my girls that even when you’re feeling snarky, you can find something positive to say. I want them to figure out how to stop the snark once in a while and see (and say) something nice.

When Alyssa complains about the annoying boys in her class and on her bus I always ask her to name one thing about these people that is nice, that is complimentary. Sometimes she scowls at me, very much just wanting to vent. But most of the time, she grins and finds something kind to say.

If we fake it until we make it, at some point we’ll be a family of kind, positive people instead of a bunch of snarky asses. That’s what I tell myself anyway.