My Girl

A few weeks ago, Tom was doing something with Olivia and I was making dinner and Alyssa wandered through the kitchen, looking forlorn. I asked if everything was okay and she just shrugged and said, "Everyone likes the little one better."

I pulled her into a hug and asked her if she knew how amazing she is.

I told her that she is so special because SHE was the one who made me a mom. Before her, I was just, well, not a mom. And once she was here, voila, a mom was made.

She grinned and looked proud.

Later that night, as I tucked her in, I reminded her that she'll always be my baby. Even when she's a big lady with a baby of her own.

She smiled and said, "Awww."

She's cute.

She also still likes to be tucked in each night and to have me lay with her until she's asleep. Some nights, I want to just get on with getting ready for bed, but even on those nights, I snuggle in close and we whisper back and forth for a few minutes until she rolls over and falls asleep.

I know that my girl isn't going to want to snuggle with me much longer. I hope to get another four years or so out of her. If I get more, I'll consider myself lucky. But I know that kids these days grow up so fast and that at some point, her mom, the mom SHE made, isn't going to be all that great as far as she's concerned.

I know that snuggles will become fewer and farther between. She'll start to pull away, establish her independence and I'll have to trust her and trust that I've done my job as her mother well, taught her to fight peer pressure (except when it comes to eating lunch at school) and to stand up for herself and those she feels aren't strong enough to do so.

But for now? She's my girl, my first born, the eight year old who still giggles when I hold her close and try to rock with her in the recliner. The girls who still needs me to reassure her that this or that change isn't that big a deal and to remind her that she actually enjoyed the last big change we made. She's the girl who has watched any and every movie with a horse more times than we can count.

For now, I'll lay with her at night, whispering and building confidence and memories with this beautiful, amazing girl who made me a mom.